Practical tips, advice and hope for those who live alone
By Gwenn Voelckers
Fall is such a special time of year.
For me, it means all good things: relaxing in front of a cozy fire, making pumpkin soup on Sunday afternoons, pulling on my well-worn leather jacket for long walks and finally turning my attention to all those inside projects I neglected over the summer.
The brilliant colors, autumn aromas and sense of industry that arrive with falling leaves really speak to me. But it hasn’t always been this way.
After my divorce, the month of October often left me melancholy. I missed sharing the beauty of the season with a special someone, and I struggled as the sunshine dwindled.
Nostalgia crept in and my first instinct was to retreat. For many of us who live alone, October can feel uniquely challenging.
But I’m not one to linger too long in “poor me.”
Over time, I found ways to rekindle my love for autumn. With a little creativity, fall can become a season of possibility — a time to mix it up, stay engaged, and even grow.
Here’s a peek at my annual fall “game plan.” Maybe one or two ideas will add a little extra color to your own life this October:
Tackle indoor projects
Fall is perfect for checking off those nagging to-do’s.
I keep a running list right where I can see it — both as a motivator and as a reminder that I’ve got plenty of productive things to do when the sky turns gray.
Organize a closet, touch up your painted cabinets, update your will or clean out that inbox.
There’s nothing like getting something done to beat the autumn blues.
Get up and get going
Chilly mornings make it tempting to pull the covers over your head, but staying in bed too long rarely helps the mood.
I’ve discovered the best way to start my day is to rise early and give myself some quiet time. A cup of coffee, a short meditation and a moment of gratitude set the tone beautifully.
As the morning brightens, so does my outlook.
Head outdoors
Fresh air is medicine. A sunrise walk — even on drizzly mornings — shakes off cobwebs and kick-starts my day.
Do I always want to lace up my sneakers? Not really. Do I ever regret it? Never.
Some days I walk alone to clear my head; other days, I walk with my sister Anne or my good friend Kate. These “walks and talks” help me resist the siren song of isolation as the days grow shorter.
Learn something new
Autumn and learning just go together. The start of the school year still sparks something in me. Each fall, I challenge myself to try something fresh. Last year, I started French lessons on Duolingo, the language-learning app. (Day 376 and still going strong!)
This year, I’m going to look at joining a drumming circle.
Opportunities are everywhere — libraries, community centers, colleges, or online. Pick something that excites you, then dive in.
Invite people in
Nothing chases away the October blues like sharing your space. Over the years, I’ve hosted simple gatherings around favorite TV shows or sporting events.
During the “Downton Abbey” years, Sunday nights meant soup, salad and friends. What’s your pleasure — football, “All Creatures Great and Small” or maybe “The Great British Baking Show?” A pot of pumpkin soup, a few friends, and a TV screen can turn an ordinary night into a warm memory.
There are plenty of ways to enjoy the fall season and lift your spirits — but they don’t happen by magic. A little creative effort goes a long way.
If you’re ready to turn over a new leaf, October is the perfect time. Remember: leaves aren’t the only things that can change this season — you can, too!
Gwenn Voelckers is a certified life coach (CLC), columnist and author of “Alone and Content,” a collection of inspiring essays for those who live alone. She welcomes your comments, questions, and inquiries at gvoelckers@rochester.rr.com